Chapter 7 & 8 Interpersonal Communication

What is interpersonal communication?
Interpersonal communication is the process by which people exchange information, feelings and meaning through verbal and non-verbal message.
Interpersonal communication is not just about what is actually said the language used but how it is said and the non-verbal messages sent through tone of voice, facial expression, gestures and body language.




                                                          The Conversation Process

       There five steps of conversation process. There are opening, feedforward, business, feedback and closing.
        Opening always involves some kind of greeting. Such as, in
face-to-face conversation and in
e-mail. Greeting can be involves verbal and non-verbal but usually are involves both.
          Feedforward is the second step of conversation. One function is to open channels of communication. The next function of feedforward is to preview future messages.
          The next conversation process is business. To directed at achieving some goal. In conversation, you conduct this business through an exchange of speaker and listener roles.
           Feedback is the reverse of the second conversation process. We usually do this in face-to-face conversation and your response to a previous e-mail.
          The last conversation process is closing. Closing have the intention to end the conversation. Different cultures have different rules and custom in conversation.

                                                        Principle of Conversation

1. Principle of Turn-Taking

    (i) Turn-maintaining
           -Speaker wish to maintain the role of speaker.
           - Paralanguage, Eye contact
     (ii) Turn-yielding
           - Speaker finished talking and wishes to exchange the role of speaker for the role of  listener.
           -Gestures, verbal
      (iii) Turn-requesting
            - Listener is ready to speak.
            - Paralanguage
       (iv) Turn-denying
            - Listener wish to maintain the role of listener.
            - Shaking head, looking away


2. Principle of  Dialogue

           Dialogue is a conversation between two or more person. Those people will share messages to one another. Dialogue involves speaker and listener; sender and receiver. It indicates an interaction rather than just a conversation.


3. Principle of Immediacy

                        Immediacy is the most effective conversation. Immediacy is the creation of closeness, a sense of togetherness, of oneness, between speaker and listener. When you communicate immediacy you convey a sense of interest and attention, a liking for an attraction to other person.

Chapter 9: Friends, Lovers & Families

         




           First of all, I think everyone have the three common and important relationships in our lives. The three major types of relationships is friendships, romantic relationships and family relationships.

         


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            As with any relationship, friendships bring support and joy and occasionally strife. Friendship is an interpersonal relationship between two persons that is mutually productive and characterized by mutual positive regard (such as trust, emotional support and sharing interest).
   
     







In fact, every friendship are different. Somehow people don't know how to distinguish among the three major types of friendships.
          The first types of friendship is the friendship of reciprocity. In my opinion, this types of friendship is the most perfect of friendship. This friendship is characterized by loyalty, self-sacrifice, mutual affection and generosity. This types of friendship is also based on equality. Every person will share equally in giving and receiving the benefits and rewards of the relationship.
            The second types of friendship is the friendship of receptivity. This types of friendship is an imbalance in giving and receiving. One person is the primary giver and one the primary receiver. This is the friendship tat may develop between teacher and students or between doctor and patient. That's a difference in status is essential for the relationship of receptivity to develop.
           The friendship of association is  a transitory one. It can be described as a friendly relationship. There no great loyalty, no great trust, no great giving and receiving. For example, classmates, neighbors, coworkers.

     
   Furthermore, there a few of reasons that we seek out and close relationships. The first reason is utility. Individual who may have some special talents, skills or resources that can help you achieve your specific goals and needs. For instance, those who good in English may teach you that subject.
            Affirmation is individual who affirm your personal value and help you to recognize your attributes. For example, someone who would help you look more clearly your leadership abilities.
            The next reason is ego support. Individual who behave in supportive and encouraging and helpful manner. For example, you will look friendships with people who will help you view yourself as worthy.
            Stimulation is someone introduces you to new ideas and help you expand your worldview
             The last reason is security. Individual who does nothing to hurt you or to emphasize or remind attention to your weaknesses.


           We can distinguish three main stages of friendship development. The first stage of friendship
development is obviously an initial meeting of some kind (Initial contact and acquaintances). The first and important impressions are formed. Important to stay open and welcoming of the presence of your new acquaintance.
               Then, each others will slowly become casual friendship. In this second stage, the dyadic consciousness will takes place. Sometimes, each others will doing somethings together.
               In this last stage of close and intimate friendship, there an intensification of the casual friendship. The most intimate forms of togetherness.

             The friendship will be influenced by your culture, gender differences and technology. In short, different cultures can be bring about a different meaning to friendships and relationships. Obviously, friendships are closer in collectivist cultures than individualist cultures. Members of collectivist culture are more better and having more friends than individualist cultures. On the other hands, members of individualist cultures are more having a desire to excel than other people. In their minds, they think that the less friends they have, the more chance of getting a promotion on workplace.